Outtaverse part 2 : Appendicitis
by Madcap13
Summary: Ready for more out of characterness? Giles get a new book, Buffy gets a new scar, Riley does something stupid. Oh wait. That's not that unusual. I guess I'll have to do better next time.


Outtaverse part 2: Appendicitis.

Summary: Ready for more out of characterness? Faith does something right for once and two Sunnydale landmarks get blown up in one episode. Giles get a new book, Buffy gets a new scar, Riley does something stupid. Oh wait. That's not that unusual.

Disclaimer : Oh yes. Please give me credit for Joss Whedon's hard work. :P

Distribution : I like to please.

Feedback : Send your flame-grilled loving this way.

Warning : Occasional swearing, sex, voilence, disturbing situations. Sorta like the show.

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Faith clutched the book to her bosom as she ran through the cold Sunnydale streets.

Cold?

It doesn't get this cold here, even at night.

Faith blinked and gasped for the air that wouldn't fill her lungs, realizing that it was the middle of the day.

People moved aside as she hobbled past them, which was good. She didn't have the energy to fight them.

The pain she was in, even this was better than what the demon was doing to her, trying to fill her up with some sort of demon mojo to make her work his will.

She wouldn't lose herself like that. She wanted to remain Faith and she was going to kick and scream for as long as she could.

In fact, she did kick and she did scream. That was what got her free.

Faith stopped on a corner, trying to think.

She was free.

But freedom was just another word that meant she had nothing, that she was nothing.

She reminded herself that she couldn't think for long because that was when the darkness came.

She was in Sunnydale. This was Buffy's world. She would know what to do. She would help her or kill her.

Either way, she would take the pain away.

This book would help Buffy. It was important, she knew it.

Shaking her head clear again, she started running again.

She stumbled along the familiar street and ran across a lawn up to a house and fell shoulder first on the door. If anyone was home, they would've heard that.

Her lungs felt like they were full of lead, her legs felt like they were made of straw and her feet felt like pancakes.

This was it, the end.

She had just enough to face one last truth. One last breath to say something that really mattered. She wanted it to be heard but speaking it out loud would have to be enough.

"Buffy. I'm sorry." She said as the darkness overcame her, "I love you."

-----

"Buffy who is it?" Joyce called to her daughter.

Buffy stared at Faith's body where it laid on her front porch.

Faith's modesty was covered in long strips of black gauze and the neon blue designs painted on her exposed skin topped off the whole ritualistic look she had going on.

"Buffy?" Joyce called with a little concern in her voice.

Buffy backed away from the door slowly, as if scared and called back "Mom."

Joyce came running out to see what the matter was and gasped when she saw the body, "Faith."

"I just found her there." Buffy babbled, "I-I.. She just.."

Buffy looked back at her mother to find that she had fainted.

"Buffy? What's going on?" Dawn asked from the top of the stairs.

-----

In no time at all, all of the Scoobies had arrived at the Summers household and they were staring at Faith on the couch.

Once Buffy realized that Faith wasn't dead and didn't seem to have any life threatening injuries, Buffy had cleaned the paint off her and wrapped her in a blanket. Giles really wished she hadn't done that but said nothing.

Joyce was sitting in the armchair across from Faith while Dawn did her best to make tea for her in the kitchen.

Everyone else was staring at Faith as she slept.

"What do we do with her?" Anya asked out loud.

"She should wake up soon." Buffy said, prodding Faith, "Wakey wakey, Faith. Time to face the music."

If Faith had felt that, she didn't show it.

"Sure she's just not pretending?" Xander asked Buffy.

Giles hemmed, "Faith was never this good at acting."

"It's a coma." Anya told them, "She's asleep, unresponsive, weak heartbeat and it looks like she's dead. It's a coma."

"I said the exact same thing." Dawn told Anya as she came out with a cup of tea, which she gave to Joyce, "But did anyone listen? No."

"So what do we do with her again?" Anya asked.

"We take care of her." Buffy told them, "But we'll have to do it ourselves."

"Why ourselves?" Riley asked, "A hospital could deal with her better."

Buffy sighed, "Because if we take her to a hospital then someone will just pluck her right out of it. Either the watchers or whoever she was running away from when she came here. They must've been bad for her to come to me for help. Oh and Giles, Faith was carrying that book with her. That might give us some clues as to who would want their own slayer."

Giles frowned as he picked up the book and translated the chicken scratchings on the front, "The nim-rod-im appendix. Never heard of it."

"You can read that?" Dawn asked, impressed.

"Yes, Dawn. I can read it. It's just akkadian." Giles said as he opened the book and looked through it, taking note of various pages, "No. Make that an obscure sub-dialect of sumerian. Umm. This might take a while to translate."

"Obscure sumerian. Ouch." Willow cringed, "Isn't it all obscure?"

"We're getting off the topic of the homicidal killer here." Xander told the room, "What are we going to do with her?"

"She came to us for help so we'll help her. She's not evil, you know." Buffy said quietly, She's just lonely and confused and doesn't give a damn about much at all. But that doesn't make her evil."

Xander gave her an incredulous look, "Actually, I think that sums up evil pretty good. You're talking about the person who just possessed me."

"She didn't do that on purpose." Buffy told him and at his look of disbelief she defended her claims by saying "She told me. Sorta."

"And you believed her?" Willow asked.

"Yes. Yes, I do. In fact, she thought Xander did the spell and you were in her body. She thought you were getting the better half of the deal too but she wasn't out to punish you for it. She just wanted to get out of town and be left alone. So, I'm not going kill her. If no one else will help me, I'll take care of her by myself."

"And what about when she wakes up?" Xander asked.

"When she wakes up, she'll leave town. I won't stop her. She can go for all I care."

"And I will help too." Joyce said, "But I should point out that we don't know anything about treating someone in a coma. They don't take care of themselves."

"Yeah. We'll need medical equipment." Willow said, "IV drip. Something to monitor her vitals and someone's going to have to give her a regular sponge bath."

"Ewww." Dawn grimaced, "Don't you have to do something with a catheter too?"

Buffy sighed, "I can do that. It's not like I haven't been there before."

At everyone's stare Buffy explained, "When Faith swapped bodies with me. What did you think I meant?"

"Nothing." Riley said, "It was just a strange thing to say."

Everyone took the time to stare at Faith.

"So, what do we do?" Buffy asked them.

"Uh. Research time?" Willow suggested, "I could look up medical care on the internet which should give us some leads on what we'll need to take care of here."

"Good. A plan of action." Buffy said cheerfully as she smiled at Willow, "Um. Mom? Should we put her in the spare room?"

Joyce nodded but followed her daughter as Buffy gently picked up Faith in the bundle of blankets she was wrapped and walked her upstairs.

"I don't know if I like this." Anya said, "What if she swaps bodies with me next time? She'll take my Xander from me."

Xander chuckled, "Anya. It's not like body swapping is her super power. She's only done it twice."

"You don't think she's just feeling guilty, do you?" Willow asked the group about Buffy, "Because we all thought Faith was dead. Did anyone else feel a little guilty?"

With that conflicted frown of concern that Tara sometimes gets, she said "I think Buffy has a point. We have to take care of Faith."

"We need to find out what she was running from too." Riley added, "And we can't do that if she doesn't tell us. It's a logical plan of action."

"Apart from the nutty bits." Xander mumbled.

Giles looked up from the book he was perusing to say, "Riley is correct. Buffy's plan is the only choice we have. Although Faith has caused problems in the past, she's the only link we have to where this book came from."

"It's just a book." Xander argued, "It's not like you don't have enough of those."

Giles shook his head slowly, "This is not just any book, Xander. This is a very.. interesting work."

"How interesting?" Willow asked, "Like rites of ascension interesting?"

Giles frowned, "Not quite. Uh, well. Possibly. I'm not entirely sure quite yet but what I have loosely translated is.. very worrisome."

Xander sighed, "Yup. Those Sumerians sub-dialects really knew how to be obscure."

Giles looked at him with a touch of annoyance, "Xander. What I have in my hands is perhaps the most insightful book of magic I've ever come across and I've never even heard of it before. A work like this I should have heard of before. That fact that I haven't is curious to say the least."

"It could be fake." Dawn told him.

Giles frowned, "Yes. There is that possibility. Regardless, I really must start transcribing this immediately. Uh, if you'll excuse I'll be going."

Giles walked out the door, his nose still stuck in the book as he went.

Riley sighed, "I'll get the medical equipment Buffy needs."

Willow frowned, "Are you sure?"

Riley nodded grudgingly, "Sure. I have a little medical training and I already know where to get what I need."

"Then Tara and I will check in with Spike." Willow volunteered, "And see if there's any new big bads in town."

Tara looked at Willow, surprised, "We will?"

Willow grinned, "Sure. I'll show you Spikes crypt. It's creepy."

Xander snorted, "That is, if you think spider webs are creepy."

Tara's eyes widened, "Spiders?"

"That'll have to be our good deed for the day." Willow said with a shrug as she walked out the door too, followed by Tara.

Xander sighed and followed them, "And I've got work."

"Byiee." Dawn said, waving goodbye to Xander like a little retard.

Xander spared her a smile, "Bye, Dawn. Say bye to your family for us.".

"Xander." Riley called as he chased them outside, "Can I ask you something... in private?"

Anya raised an eyebrow, "Oh. You mean without me. Why didn't you just say so? I'll wait in the car."

Once she started walking away, Riley turned to Xander and asked him, "Is Buffy always so intense about Faith? What happened between them?"

"Faith and Buffy have a complicated bond. I don't fully understand it but I'll make it simple for you. Faith is crazy and Faith makes Buffy crazy too. As I said, I don't understand it."

Riley looked at the grass of the front lawn, clearly troubled by something.

"Riley. You okay?" Xander asked him, "If this is about Faith and what she did to you. I can relate. She .. Faith did some bad things to me too."

"Buffy never talks about her. I don't know a thing about her."

"Faith was a slayer who went really really bad. She something crawled up the inside of her ass and went rotten. She scares me more than most of the things on the hellmouth. Not because of what she can do to me but because I've never seen anything like that happen to someone before. At least vampires and demons being evil makes a certain amount of sense. That girls a slayer. She's supposed to be on our side."

"I can understand that."

"Anyway, I gotta go." Xander said, looking at the nonexistent watch on his wrist while he had a perfectly existent one on his other wrist, "Work, remember?"

Riley nodded slightly, "Sure. I've got work too."

-----

Sunnydale University library.

Riley had found that living on campus had advantages.

One of them was access to the university's exhaustive library.

Riley had two very heavy medical books open on the table and he was jotting down a list of equipment on a little pad as he read through the books.

Maybe tomes would be a better word for them. It sounded like tomb and they were just as inviting.

To Riley's credit, he wasn't afraid of them.

"It's good to see you're finally giving your condition some thought." Graham, one of Riley's odd initiative buddies said as they sat down on the opposite side of the table.

Riley looked up and frowned at him, "I thought I told you we had nothing to talk about."

Graham sighed, "Riley. If you try to operate on yourself, you'll wind up killing yourself."

"This isn't for me." Riley told him.

Graham picked up one the books and skimmed through the page it was on, "Intensive care. Is there something you want to tell me?"

"No."

Graham frowned but didn't push, "Look. Riley. This paranoia trip you're on has to stop. Every time you go out with your honey, you're risking a heart attack or worse."

"Or worse, huh?" Riley asked, not impressed.

"Remember Faraday? He died from a brain aneurysm. There wasn't any warning. He just fine one minute and then the next, he was dead. Like a switch. It turns out his body didn't adapt to the treatments as well as the doctors thought and man, you haven't even had your system checked. Who knows what extra bells and whistles Walsh put in you."

"I'm fine." Riley said scornfully, "Now leave me alone."

Riley got up and started returning the medical books to their shelves.

"Faraday was fine too." Graham told him, tailing him.

Riley took one last look at Graham then kept walking.

-----

Somewhere else in Sunnydale, a smoldering pile of house had collapsed in on itself.

Firefighters declared that it was a gas leak and left it at that. No one would question that since Sunnydale was notorious for it's gas leaks.

But the firefighters had left hours ago, so they missed a hand rising out of the ground to weakly push aside a plank of charred wood that obstructed it's owner from getting out of it's premature grave.

Slowly, the figure pulled himself free from the ground but this was no vampire, otherwise they would be bursting into flames in the high noon sun.

This was Doc and he looked pissed.

Also, very very dirty.

-----

There was a knock at the door to Spike's Crypt.

Spike's brow furrowed as he placed an arrow in his crossbow.

"Come in!" he called cheerfully and aimed the crossbow at the door.

Willow and Tara walked into the crypt then Spike groaned and fell over as his chip struck him with a voltage across his little pink bits.

"Bloody hell!" Spike swore as he got up with a hand on his forehead, "What do you think you're doing?"

Willow and Tara looked at him confused.

"You knocked!" Spike cried, like this was significant somehow, "No one knocks!"

"Sorry?" Tara asked Willow, who shrugged.

Turning his back on them, Spike asked "What are you doing here?"

"We're here for information." Willow told him.

Spike turned around and looked at them, "Why you two?"

"I volunteered." Willow said with a grin.

Spike shrugged and faced them fully, "Better you than Buffy, I guess. Bint always uses me to work out her frustration. What from, I'll let you figure that out."

Willow and Tara looked at each other for a beat, unsure how to handle that bit of news.

"We're looking for someone who would want Faith." Willow told Spike.

"The bad egg, huh? Hmm. Nothing springs to mind."

"Are there any new big bads in town recently?" Willow asked him.

"No. Just the usual." Spike said, rubbing his chin, "Which amounts to just me, I guess."

Willow frowned, "So you don't know anything?"

"It's strange. Recently, people have been forgetting to tell me their evil plans. I'm betting my popularity has gone down hill since I started killing the evils of Sunnydale."

"What about someone who would want to experiment on a slayer?" Tara asked.

Spike raised an eyebrow, "Experiment how?"

"Magically." Willow told him.

Spike thought about it, "There's more than a few people in town who would get off having their own slayer but none of them have the brass monkeys to try to capture one. See, that's the difficult part."

Noting the disappointment on their faces he sighed and said "I'll tell you what. I'll ask around later tonight. If I find anything out, I'll go directly to you. I'm for anything that acts as a buffer between me and Buffy."

-----

Buffy stood back, impressed at Riley's medical training put to use.

"Where did you get all this?" Buffy asked Riley as he hooked up a liquid nutrient to a metal stand, so that it would gravity feed into Faith

"An old initiative storeroom."

Buffy chuckled, "Some people steal pens when they quit a job. You steal medical supplies. That's just the quirky type of thing I'd expect from the man I love."

Buffy moved over to Riley and kissed him until Buffy frowned, mid-kiss and backed off.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

Riley looked embarrassed, "There's still the matter of the diapers. We're using diapers, aren't we? I couldn't find a catheter."

Buffy frowned, "And once more, Faith puts me in another uncomfortable situation. Yeah, I'll diaper her. Don't worry."

"BUFFY!" Dawn yelled from downstairs, "WILLY IS ON THE PHONE FOR YOU!"

Buffy opened the door and looked down the stairs and asked her sister "Who?"

"Willy." Dawn called, "He seems to know you."

Buffy huffed and stormed down the stairs, taking the phone from her sister.

"Hello, Willy?"

"I've got a demon wrecking my bar." Willy the barman told her.

"Oh, THAT Willy." Buffy snorted, "So why did you phone me?"

"It's a demon. An evil one. Really evil. I think it might want to end the world as we know it. You kill that kind, don't you?"

"Nah. I gave that up years ago. You didn't know?"

"Please. I'll pay you."

Buffy smiled evilly, "Really? How much?"

"Fifty bucks."

"For fifty bucks you can slay it yourself."

"Okay. A hundred. But that's my last offer."

"I thought it was wrecking your bar? Is it only worth a hundred dollars to you?"

"Well, yeah. I got the bar for free you know."

"Really?"

"Off my cousin. Had a problem with serving demons. Can you imagine that?"

"Yeah, whatta weirdo. Okay. I'll help you out. Be there shortly."

"Better be-"

Buffy cut him off before he could finish his sentence.

"Since when did you get paid for slaying?" Dawn asked Buffy.

"Umm.. about three seconds ago." Buffy said with a wicked grin,

"We up?" Riley asked her.

Buffy nodded, "We're up."

-----

A few minutes later, Riley and Buffy pulled up next to Willy's bar.

Willy and a few demons were hanging outside in the stark sunlight. They really looked out of place.

"Hey, Willy." Buffy said jovially to him as she came up, brandishing a wickedly shiny broadsword, "How's business?"

"It's still in there." Willy told her, pointing a thumb to his bar, "You can still hear it chewing if you listen."

"So, what kind of demon is it?" Buffy asked.

"Did you ever see that movie, the blob?" One of the demons asked her.

Buffy looked the demon up and down. It looked harmless. Almost childlike. It was sitting on the ground, nursing his leg where he had a bit torn out.

"How do they kill the blob again?" Buffy asked, "It involved a snow cone maker, didn't it?"

"I think it was a snow machine." Riley told her, "Uh. Hang on. It's not actually like the blob, is it?"

"Nah. Nothing like that." Willy told her, trying to dismiss their fears, "It's got teeth."

"That's just great." Buffy said sarcastically, "Okay. I'll check it out. Riley, you stay out here with your car."

Riley looked at her askew for a second then understood that she was trying to stop the theft of his car.

Buffy used the broadsword to prod the door open and she peered into the bar which looked like a bomb hit it.

A bomb full of demon bits and the occasional bit of furniture instead of the normal fragmentation and explosion variety.

But it looked like the worst was over since there was no blob.

Alert for danger, she walked into the bar, her broadsword held before her.

Seeing something shiny on the ground, she knelt to find a few small red pearls, which she picked up and placed in her pocket to show Giles later.

She looked along the floor for any more and that's when she heard the chewing coming from above her.

Looking up at the ceiling, she found an oily writhing mass hugging the ceiling. It's surface covered in mouths full of teeth and a myriad of eyes.

In time with the chewing, crunching sounds it was squishing itself together like someone playing with plasticine.

Buffy stepped back so she wasn't directly under it anymore and watched as it formed a tendril and snatched a severed demon arm off on the tables and brought it into itself like a fist closing around a flower.

She knew it knew she was there by the amount of eyes it had on her.

Then it attacked, falling from the ceiling at her.

Buffy jumped to the side onto a bar table to avoid it and it whipped out a tendril to grab her but all it got was it's tendril cut off by Buffy's broadsword.

It whipped out a few more and Buffy dodged them by jumping onto another table then off it onto the floor.

When she landed, she hooked her hand underneath a barstool and threw it at the creatures dead center.

When it struck, the blob creature was knocked back then proceeded to eat the wooden chair.

Buffy frowned at this and started to assess her options.

But the chair didn't slow it down and it rushed her, growing in height like a tidal wave as it did.

Buffy flinched but at the last possible moment, she flashed sideways and brought her sword up and into the creature, cutting it half.

"I'd pull a pun right now but who'd hear it? You don't have ears do you?" Buffy asked the blob as it reformed it's two halves together like two puddles of mercury would merge together.

Buffy blinked and realized that she was in more trouble than she thought.

Enraged, the blob howled at her and flung a barstool at her, which she barely dodged.

Then a large tendril full of sharp teeth whipped out to hit Buffy as she was still in motion.

Buffy used her sideways momentum to do a high jump over the tendril attack which kept going and lodged deep in the wall.

Buffy heard a hissing sound, which she thought was coming from the blob.

Then a giant plume of fire blew out from the where the blob hit the wall.

Buffy and the writhing mass both recoiled back from the oppressive heat.

Fortunately, the flame was growing smaller and smaller in intensity as it crept back into the small crack in the wall.

Both Buffy's eyes and the blobs shot wide open as they realized what was about to happen.

She bolted through the door and once outside she yelled "RUN!"

A second later, the bar exploded outwards, picking her off her feet and slamming her into the opposite wall, knocking her out.

-----

When Buffy woke up, the air was thick with smoke and Riley was in her face.

"Buffy. How many fingers?"

Without looking Buffy joked, "Seventeen?"

Riley smirked, "Good guess."

Riley helped Buffy to sit upright and that's when she saw the remains of Willy's bar.

"Good going, Slayer." Willy said scornfully, "Look what you did to my bar! I should've let the blob have it."

Buffy gasped at him, "That wasn't me. It was the monster."

Riley couldn't help but laugh, "I'd be proud if I did that."

"Well. I'm not paying you for blowing up my bar." Willy said defiantly.

Buffy sighed, "That's fair I guess. It's not like I almost died or anything. Come on, Riley. Let's blow this hotdog stand. Oh wait. I already did that."

-----

When Riley and Buffy entered the magic box, they found Giles on the other side of the counter, dutifully taking notes of the book Faith acquired.

"Buffy! Riley!" Giles said, excited in a bookish way, "This appendix is amazing."

"That's great." Buffy said, trying to be upbeat and failing, "Uh, Giles. I almost just got blown up."

Giles looked up from the book for the first time since he got it and looked at her, "Buffy. What happened? Are you okay?"

Buffy nodded and sat down on a chair, careful not to hurt herself anymore than needed.

"A big ugly blob went to Willy's and started snacking on the demons there. It broke a gas main and blew up the place. I think it got away. I saw it running for the sewer exit."

Giles raised an eyebrow, "A blob you say? Like the movie?"

"But with teeth." Riley told him.

"And eyes." Buffy added, "Lots of eyes."

Giles looked disturbed then looked through in the appendix.

Buffy looked at Riley and said "That book must really be a page turner. I tell him I almost died and he goes right back to reading it."

Giles ignored her until he reached the page we wanted.

"Did it look like this?" Giles asked her, holding out the appendix to show a rather stylized woodcut.

Buffy tilted her head at it sideways, "Uh. Yeah. Kinda."

"Did it bite you?" Giles asked, taking to book back to read it himself.

"No. Why? Is it poisonous?"

"Nothing like that. I believe what you saw is a creature from the outer realms. Normally they can only be summoned here by a powerful mage, after which they're programmed to perform a task for their master. They're often used as assassins." Giles told her then skimmed through the description of the creature.

"It wanted to kill Willy?" Buffy asked, "Because it was doing a good job of his bar."

Giles shook his head, "I fear that it's presence at Willy's was to feed. You see, they absorb the memories of those they eat. That's why I asked if it bit you. I presume it was there to find the information it needed to complete it's task."

"Like a flat worm." Riley stated.

"A flat worm?" Giles asked, his curiosity peaked.

Riley nodded, "You get a flatworm and let it learn a maze, then you cut it up and feed it to another flatworm and then that new flatworm absorbs it's memories. There's research done in the field of mnemonics where they are trying to place experiences in a recruit so he has the experience of a seasoned veteran."

"By eating the veteran?" Buffy asked.

Riley chuckled, "No. At least, I hope not."

Buffy frowned, "If that's true then that thing must be majorly smart after eating a room full of.. really stupid demons. But I couldn't even hurt it. I cut it in half and it didn't do anything."

Giles frowned, "It's just an animal. It would only use the memories to search for it's target. Whoever that may be. So don't worry about it building giant robots or performing brain surgery. And to hurt it.. Hang on a second. I know I've got one somewhere here."

Giles crouched behind the counter to find something for Buffy.

"Here we go. It's my last one." Giles told her, bringing out a small black velvet box.

Buffy opened the box to show a lumpy silver ring with a simple skeletal snake design pressed onto the surface.

"Giles. I don't know what to say. This is all so sudden." Buffy joked.

Giles got the joke, "It's a form of protection against various nether worldly creatures such as this one. It might come in handy."

Buffy frowned deeper, "And why didn't you give me this before?"

"Because it chips easily." Giles explained, "And they're rare. Not so expensive, just rare."

Buffy sighed and placed it on her left hand, since she favored her right and didn't want to wear it out too soon.

"Thanks. Umm. So, does it work like a cross?"

Giles gave her a lost look, "I have no idea. It suppose it may."

"How do we kill it?" Riley asked, "Do we have to freeze it?"

Giles referred to the book again, "Uh, no. You can burn it or destroy it's .. I'm not sure what that is. A vital organ, I presume."

"Seems that book is useful." Buffy admitted, "But isn't it just a bit of coincidence that it has the exact same creature in it that I just fought?"

Giles sighed, "I don't believe that it's coincidence. Obviously, the previous owner of this book was the one who summoned it. Perhaps Faith freed it when she fled from them and it's just running rampant. In any case, you should rest up until you're needed. I'll be here looking for any other advantage I can find for you."

Buffy and Riley moved to leave but Buffy turned back and pulled out the little red pearls she found at Willy's.

"Oh.. and I found these." Buffy said showing them to Giles, "They're pretty, aren't they."

Giles picked one up and looked at it, "It's a blood pearl."

"Are they expensive?" Buffy asked, "Because they look expensive and I think I might be able to get more."

Giles couldn't help but smile, "Worthless actually. They're droppings."

"Ewww."

"But they are very pretty." Giles smirked, "I think I might make a necklace out of them."

-----

Spike frowned in his sleep.

"Bloody hell." He mumbled, "What's it take for a little shuteye?"

He pulled on a shirt and pulled out the crossbow from under his bed.

He got it cocked just in time for his guest, the giant black blob to ooze it's way out of his sewer entrance and up onto the ceiling.

Backing away slowly he readied the crossbow, wondering what the creatures business was.

It roared. A terrible bay like the groans of a thousand dying.

Spike frowned at it in response and shot the loaded bolt into it to no apparent effect.

"Bugger that." he said, grabbing his favorite sun blanket and running for his door.

-----

Like a cannibalistic flat worm, Spike found his way to the Sunnydale residence in record time and knocked heavily on the front door.

"LET ME IN!" Spike yelled.

Dawn opened the door promptly and Spike came in, steaming.

"Spike!" Dawn said, clearly concerned, "You shouldn't walk around in the sun."

Spike gave her a lopsided look as he patted smoke off himself, "Is that your medical opinion, doctor Dawn?"

Dawn sputtered out a nervous laughter, "Well yeah. It is."

"Spike." Joyce greeted him, "What's the emergency?"

"What? Can't I just visit?"

This brought another laugh from Dawn.

"Oh alright. My crypt just got invaded by a big demonic ball of silly putty. Never really seen anything like it." Spike admitted, "Thought I might ask for the slayers help in getting rid of it."

"Oh. How terrible. Tea?" Joyce offered.

Spike grinned, "That'd be great."

When Buffy came home, she found Dawn and Joyce listening to the riveting adventures of everyday Spike.

Joyce grinned when she saw her daughter come in, "Buffy. Spike was just telling us about Paris."

Buffy frowned as she spotted Spike, "Why the daytime visit?"

"Weirdest thing. There I was sleeping and then this giant ball of snot came up from the sewers and decided to haunt my bedroom."

Buffy stared at him.

Spike apparently took this as an insult, "I'm not joking. It was like that movie, the blob, but with teeth and -

"Eyes." Buffy and Spike said in unison.

"Oh. So you know about it?" Spike asked.

"Yeah. It blew up Willy's bar today." Buffy told him.

"Arr. That's why you look a bit under the weather?" Spike asked, "You look flushed."

Buffy shrugged, "I got pretty close to the blast. I was hoping the fire killed that thing too."

"No such luck. It looked perfectly alive to me."

Buffy frowned, "It didn't chase you when you left your crypt?"

"It looked determined to stay there. Shady behavior for a blob."

Buffy shook her head , "No. It's waiting for me to visit your crypt. Well, that's fine. I'll just take a rest then finish it off after Giles finishes researching it."

"And what am I supposed to do until then?" Spike asked, "Sleep in the basement? Hey, could I?"

Joyce considered this, "You might need to move some boxes but you can if you really want to."

Buffy rolled her eyes, "Yeah, because it's not like we don't already have one killer sleeping under our roof."

"Buffy!" Joyce corrected Buffy, "Don't call her that."

"Excuse me. What am I missing?" Spike asked them.

"Faith." Dawn told him, "She's in a coma upstairs."

Spike slowly raised an eyebrow at this, "Wasn't she in a coma before?"

"It's a recurring theme." Buffy told him.

"It's actually pretty fun." Dawn said with a silly grin, "You can make her do funny faces and she can't do anything about it."

"Dawn." Joyce scolded in a motherly tone.

"What?" Dawn asked her mother with a look of innocence, "Research shows that constant and varied stimulation of a coma patient is conducive to their recovery."

On one hand Joyce knew this was just an excuse for juvenile behavior and on the other hand it was just so adorable.

"Come on, Spike. I'll show you. It's fun." Dawn said, dragging Spike up the stairs.

"Has she been sprinkling coffee on her captain crunch again?" Spike asked Buffy as she followed them.

"I hope not." Buffy told him, "Not after she shampooed her hair with peanut butter."

"I told you, that was for science." Dawn defended herself.

-----

Riley's dorm room.

Riley was talking into the phone.

"Okay. It's at Spikes crypt. Why do you think it'll stay there?" he asked.

"Because it's just an animal. It obviously went to Spikes because it knew I'll go there." Buffy told him, "When Giles finds a better way to tackle it we'll walk over all casual and take care of it."

Riley frowned, "Okay then. I'll pick you up later. Rest up."

"Bye, honey." Buffy chirped, "See you soon."

"Bye." Riley replied and put down the phone.

Then Riley's gaze fell open the oxyacetylene gas canisters that he had wheeled into his room from somewhere.

He reached onto his bed and picked up the long cavalry sword that he had acquired somewhere.

It was a lot heavier than it looked but he didn't seem to notice the weight.

He swung it a few times to practice.

"This aint so hard. I can do this."

-----

The clouds in the sky turned into splatterings of tasteless pinks and reds as the sun crept under the mountains in the distance.

Giles took particular note of the time of day when someone knocked on the front door to the magic box.

He looked at the door confused.

"Uh. Come in." he called, "It's not locked."

Harmony walked in with a smile, "Thanks. I thought you weren't going to invite me in."

Giles blinked, not expecting her.

"You know, you don't an invite to enter a shop."

Harmony frowned, "R-right. I knew that."

"Can I help you with something?" Giles asked.

"No. I'm just looking." Harmony said with a weak smile as she looked over a store full of things she couldn't afford.

Giles tried to go back to his book but found his attention to stretched between that and watching the vampire walking willy-nilly through his store.

"Harmony." Giles called gently, "Can I ask you something?"

Pleased to have his attention she plodded over to the counter and nodded happily, "Yes please. I mean, sure. Go ahead."

"While I would like to thank you with helping Buffy fight Faith, I was wondering how you knew Xander wasn't himself."

"I just knew. It was the look in his eyes." Harmony said, squinting her own eyes to show what she meant.

"Really?" Giles asked, not buying that.

"Yeah." Harmony said sadly, "That's what happened. It's not like he swept me off my feet with sweet words and used me and threw me away like a popsicle stick or anything."

Harmony couldn't handle the look of utter shock from Giles so she went and sat down at the large table in the center of the room, facing away from him.

His mouth shaped a few words but he didn't speak as he tried to figure out what she just said and then she started crying.

He seemed a little torn between what was important and the crying dead girl in his store.

Resigned to a course of action, he pulled out a bottle of Jack Daniels and two small shot glasses and met her at the table.

Without looking up at him, she sobbed "It wasn't supposed to be like this. I'm supposed by in Paris. Not some small time floozy for men to beat around."

" Paris?" Giles asked conversationally as he poured out two shots of Whiskey.

Harmony nodded, "For the fashion. What are you doing?"

"I thought this might help."

Harmony stared blankly at the shot glass for a second then picked up it an knocked it back like a pro.

Giles did the same in time with her.

Afterwards, that's when she coughed as some of it went down the wrong tube, "Ugh. Strong! Gyyahh."

"But do you feel better?"

"No." Harmony said sullenly, pushing the shot glass across the table for another shot, "I still miss everything. I miss room service and the beach and clean sheets."

"You can still go to the beach at night." Giles told her, having poured two more shots.

They slugged them back in time. Harmony wasn't many things but it turned out that she was an intuitive heavy drinker and didn't have any trouble this time.

"It's not the same. During the day, the sun is all around you, like it's hugging you.. Like it loves you." Harmony told him with the slightest tilt to her voice, "I even miss school. How sad is that?"

"I believe I can relate."

They both stayed silent, waiting for Giles to finish the shots, then they both took themselves, looking into each others eyes as they drank them.

"You just have to move on with your life. We all do." Giles said, recovering from the dizzying effects of the whiskey.

"How am I supposed to do that? Get a job? I don't even have a degree. I don't even have a pulse." Harmony cried, distraught.

Giles didn't know how to answer her so he poured them both more whiskey.

"Just one more after this. I don't want to get too tipsy." Giles told her.

"Right. Just one more." Harmony agreed.

"Just one more." Giles warned her.

Harmony nodded, "Yeah. Just one more. You're right."

-----

Spike watched as Dawn made Faith smile like the joker out of Batman the movie.

Dawn frowned, "It looks a lot better when she does it herself."

"Really?" Spike asked.

Dawn nodded, "She gets these absolutely cute dimples."

Spike chuckled and Dawn asked him "What?"

"Slayers."

"What about them?"

"They're always so cute. It's a conspiracy, I tell ya. Someone somewhere is having a good laugh at them."

Dawn smirked, "You think Buffy's cute?"

Spike snorted, "Not my type, luv. She is cute though. Don't tell her I said that though."

"What about her nose? It's deformed."

Before Spike could agree a huge shockwave rippled through the house. Downstairs, a vase fell off it's base and broke on the floor.

Outside in the streets, half the car alarms in Sunnydale started up.

Spike and Dawn stared at each other in shock.

"What was that?" Dawn asked him.

"That was an explosion." Spike said as he moved through the house to a window that looked out in the direction of the explosion.

What he saw when he looked out the window took his breath away.

In the graveyard there was a mushroom cloud of smoke and flying debris was raining down from the sky. The site looked like an active volcano.

"Buffy." Dawn said as her sister appeared in the hallway, "Someone blew up Spike's crypt."

-----

Riley was flat on his back, half conscious but still in one piece.

He let out a long groan as he got back onto his feet and looked at the damage he caused.

Riley was more used to using conventional military explosive than using gas but he understood the theory.

Still, you think they could've warned him in the army about what sort of explosion this would've caused.

The Crypt was completely gone. In it's place was a sizable crater where the tunnels had caved in.

Dusting himself off, Riley got up and said "Scratch one demon blob."

Triumphantly he started to walk away, totally oblivious to the black ooze climbing up the side of the crater.

It was only when his made a high pitched shriek that he turned and took his sword from it's sheath.

"You've gotta be kidding me." Riley said as the mass of black steaming flesh rolled towards him.

It whipped out with a huge tentacle and he cut it into it, cleaving it off as it knocked him across the graveyard.

His passage across the slick grass was stopped when he hit a monument with a big stone statue on top of it.

When he hit, the statue tipped over and fell on him, pinning him in place.

"Arrhh!" Riley cried out, trying to get the statue off him but he was too late.

Before he could register it's presence, the blob tore a little chunk out of right forearm. Just a taste test.

Riley fumbled with his battle harness, trying to find something that would help him but he knew that this was the end for him.

At least, that's what he thought.

Instead it let out what Riley thought was a happy shriek, "Iyaa!" and then it sped off.

"Riley!" Buffy yelled as she ran towards him.

"Buffy?" Riley said in confusion. He wasn't expecting her to be there.

Buffy lifted the statue off him gently despite it's weight.

"Riley. What the hell were you doing?" Buffy asked him.

Riley, who wasn't as hurt as he thought he would be, rolled out from under the statue and told her "I don't think fire kills it."

"Look what you did!" Spike yelled, flabbergasted at the crater where his nest used to be.

"What's he doing here?" Riley asked Buffy.

"Riley. Not now. We need to chase that thing. Are you okay?"

"Yeah." Riley told her, tearing off a piece of his shirt to tie around his arm, "I'm good."

"Good. Let's go."

They both got in Riley's car which he had parked on the graveyards main path. Luckily not too close to the hole in the ground.

Then they drove off, leaving Spike to his loss.

"It bit you and it's running for someone." Buffy noted, "Oh God. It's heading for Faith."

Buffy fished the cell phone out of her pocket and phoned up her house.

"Dawn!" She yelled into the phone, "Get mom and get out of the house. There's a demon coming to kill Faith. Get out of there NOW!"

Dawn obviously understood because Buffy put the phone away.

Riley watched the path the blob was taking as it jumped over the top of rooftops and said "Buffy. I don't think it cares about Faith. It's going more towards the magic box."

Buffy looked at him, confused, "But why? Who would it assassinate in the magic box? Oh god, Giles!"

Buffy sighed and pulled out her cell phone and started punching out a number.

"Pick up, Giles." Buffy said desperately.

After a minute, she said "There's no answer. Get there before it does."

"That's a big affirmative." Riley said, pushing the car's engine as he weaved through the streets of Sunnydale.

-----

Joyce ran out the front door with Faith wrapped in a blanket in her arms and Dawn trailing behind her, heading towards the car.

"We'll take that." A cold dead voice said behind her.

She spun around in time for a vampire to grab Faith out of her arms and sport an overly toothy grin.

As she was frozen in place, the vampire turned to dust and Faith fell back into her arms, much to her surprise.

The three other cloaked vampires looked around for the source of what killed him.

That's when they saw Willow and Tara standing down the street a while off, holding hands and with a packet full of sharpened pencils floating in the air around them.

Without much warning, the pencils flew through the air, hitting the vampires all over.

The three vampires ran off, now with pencils poking out of their shoulders, arms and one even had one pointing out of it's head.

Taking a little time to cool down from the exertion, Tara and Willow ran towards the others to check what the problem was.

" Willow! Tara!" Dawn yipped crazily, "That was amazing."

"Thank you." Joyce said hurriedly, "But we need to go now."

"What's up?" Willow asked.

"A demon's coming for Faith. You should come too. It could come at any time."

They all got into the car, Joyce and Dawn in the front with Willow and Tara in the backseat, Faith laid over their legs.

"So what brought you over?" Joyce asked conversationally as they backed out of the drive way and started driving down the street to nowhere in particular.

"Just checking in on Buffy." Willow replied, normal enough.

"Do you do that often?" Dawn asked the witches, "Because that was awesome. Do you see the vampire with the pencil in his head? That's so cool."

"I've never done anything like that before." Tara said timidly, almost scared of herself.

Willow smiled, "I've been practicing."

-----

"Stay here!" Buffy ordered Riley as she shut the side door to the car and jumped through the broken window to the magic box.

On the other side, all was quiet.

No Giles and no gooey bag of teeth and eyes.

Buffy looked to the door and realized by the open-closed sign that Giles must've closed early.

Without turning, Buffy ducked under the whirling set of buzz saw like teeth that flew through the air.

Buffy now saw the blob, hiding under the shadow of the dark arts section that Giles keeps out of bounds on the upper level.

Now realizing where it was, she approached it.

It took the time to spit out another tooth filled projectile which it bounced off the floor like a spinning stone against a pond.

On the upwards bounce, Buffy merely tilted her head to the side and let it narrowly miss cutting her ear off.

"Couldn't we do this outside?" Buffy asked it, "Giles is gonna kill me if I break his store."

The blob replied with another barb which Buffy caught in her hand like she was catching a frisbee.

After looking at it, she tossed it aside and pulled a stake out of her back pocket.

Then before it could shoot another tooth frisbee, she jumped up at it and punched it with the ring that Giles gave her.

When she struck, it was violently torn from the ceiling and throwing against the wall. What Buffy found curious was how it didn't have any recoil for her. She didn't even feel the blob when she hit it.

It shied back, trying to get away from her but Buffy wasn't going to let it now that she had it at a disadvantage.

She punched it again and it was thrown through the wall into Buffy's training room.

It wailed pitiful as it batted at her with some tendrils but she just batted them away easily. Obviously it was weakening.

"Don't feel bad that I don't like you. I didn't like the movie either."

She ran towards it and jumped high in the air, preparing for a killing blow.

When she came down, her hand went straight through it and the ring on her hand shattered against the hardwood floor.

The blob quickly reformed from the blow and covered her arm.

"ARRR!" Buffy cried as the blob tried to gnaw off her arm and she tried to ply it off her to no avail.

It was like trying to fight an oil slick your hands.

Across the floor, she spotted a hatchet and edged her way towards it.

The blob, understanding her intention, drew it's teeth deeper into her arm and dragged her away from it.

Buffy cried out again as the blob pulled more of her arm into itself and her situation looked even more dire.

That was when Riley appeared in the doorway to the training room with an armalite machinegun which he poured into the blob.

The lead splattered into it and it writhed, trying to combat the gunfire as if a swarm of bees was attacking it.

Buffy took this chance to finally free herself and yanked her arm out with deeply bleeding bite marks and tears all over it.

Cradling her arm, she backpedaled away from the blob as Riley threw a nice shiny metal canister into it.

The blob brought the canister into itself to try absorbing it and Riley shot at the blob once more and the canister exploded.

Not a fiery explosion but a reasonably violent one still.

Both Buffy and Riley shielded their eyes and when they turned back, the blob was frozen and broken in half.

Not wanting to be taken by surprise again, Riley quickly walked over to it and kicked it, shattering it into a thousand pieces.

"You got that idea off the movie." Buffy accused him.

Riley looked at her oddly, "Actually, I didn't. How's your arm?"

"Needs bandaging."

"Just wait there. I'll get the first aid kit." Riley told her and left the room for the first aid kit Giles kept behind the counter.

"I can walk." Buffy grumbled and followed him, "What were you doing in the graveyard?"

"That thing almost killed you today. I couldn't let you take that risk again."

"So you took it yourself?" Buffy asked him, "How stupid is that?"

Riley shot her an angry look but didn't say anything as he started bandaging.

"But come on. I'm the slayer and I had that nifty ring that kinda broke... Okay. I was stupid."

"Damn straight." Riley said, still breathless from the action.

Buffy decided not to argue with him and picked up the phone with her free hand.

With the phone held between her shoulder and her chin, she dialed Giles.

When he answered she sighed.

"Giles. You're okay!" Buffy said with relief, "The blob came to magic box to kill you but Riley killed it. Yay us... Uh, Giles? What's that in the background?"

"Nothing. Just hang on a second." Giles told her, held his hand over the phone for a second then put himself back on, "Uh, Buffy. I'll get back to you tomorrow, okay?"

"Uh, sure, I guess." Buffy said and the phone cut off halfway through, "Weird. Guess I'll have to find where Mom ran off to with Faith now. Uh, Riley, are you okay?"

Riley was sweating profusely and definitely did not look okay.

"Just a little jumpy." he told her.

Buffy held her hand to his head, "You're burning up."

"I feel fine. Stop moving so I can finish your bandage."

Buffy looked at him concern, "Riley. I've noticed that you've been a little.. stronger recently. People don't just get stronger all of a sudden."

Riley pinned her with a skeptical look.

"Okay. I did once but that came with a whole destiny to die young thing." Buffy admitted, "But something is going on with you. Are you on drugs?"

"No! How could you say that?" Riley asked her, shocked.

"What am I supposed to think?" Buffy asked him, "You're suddenly all strong and immune to pain. You're using your arm like it's not even hurt."

Riley clenched his hand and frowned, "Actually, it doesn't hurt."

"So what's going on?"

"It's leftovers from the initiative." Riley said, "They did all sorts of experiments to us to make us better soldiers."

Buffy frowned "You need to get this looked at. It's not healthy. Maybe you could talk to some of your old initiative contacts and find out what can be done."

"Buffy. They're the people who did this to me!"

"Have you looked at yourself? You look like crap. Monkey doo doo warmed up in the form of a man."

"Really?" Riley asked.

"We need to get you help right now. I don't want you having a stroke on me."

"I'm not going to have a stroke. I've never felt better."

"Faith didn't know when to ask for help either and look what happened to her."

"I'm not turning evil, Buffy." Riley yelled angrily.

"No. You're just going to die!" Buffy yelled back, "Let me help you."

Riley looked like he was about to argue with her then sighed, "Fine. Doesn't matter anyway."

Buffy didn't understand that so she asked more important question "Do you have a number you can call?"

Riley nodded and pulled out a card from inside his jacket.

He dialed it and got a response.

"It's Finn." he said into the phone, "Yeah. I know what the time is. I'm coming in. It'll be okay if my girlfriend watches, right? I don't want you guys to put anything new in me."

He listened then put the phone down.

"It's set. They'll have the doctor ready in twenty minutes."

"It's like they were expecting you." Buffy noted then looked at him shocked, "You knew about this."

"Buffy. Can we talk about this later?"

"Fine." Buffy huffed.

-----

Buffy waited for Riley, watching him through the window into the operating room. She was sporting a bunch of stitches along her left arm where a medical student had sewn her up. Not a bad job she thought.

Stitches that dissolve after a week were a nice touch too. She preferred them to butterfly clips.

Riley sat on the operating table in an empty room while he woke up from the anesthetics.

Buffy eventually got fed up with waiting for him and walked into the room.

"All better?" she asked hopefully.

"Back to normal." he said neutrally..

There was something wrong and Buffy realized it, "That's a good thing, isn't it?"

"Buffy. They want me back. In the army. I said yes."

Buffy blinked, "Oh... In Sunnydale, right?"

"No. It's deep under cover. No civilians involved."

"How long will you be gone?"

"I'm not coming back."

"Did they brainwash you in surgery?" Buffy asked, "Because I was watching and I didn't see any brainwashy things going on. Not that I'm an expert-"

"I'm not brainwashed. I've been thinking about this for a while."

"Then why are you leaving me? It's not like we can't use you here."

"Buffy. This situation. It's not fair for you and it's not fair for me to stay."

Buffy looked at him oddly, "Is this about you not being super powered? Riley. I don't care about that."

"It's not that."

"Then what is it?"

"You and me. We're not meant to be."

Buffy blinked, not expecting this, "Is this because I told you to stay behind? Come on, you don't just dump someone for that. We can talk this through. Work it out."

"You never let me in."

"What!?" Buffy asked, "How can you say that? In all my life, you're the one I've opened up to. You're the one I want to spend my life with."

"We both know that's not true."

Buffy stared at him, distraught.

"Look. Angel and me, we're not an item anymore. We both went our separate ways and I'm good with that."

"I'm not talking about him."

Buffy frowned at him, "Who are you talking about then?"

Riley got off the table and tried to figure out a way to say it.

In the end he just spat it out.

"Buffy. I know you're gay."

Words couldn't describe the look on Buffy's face. They were somewhere between disgust and confusion and laughing at the sheer ridiculousness of that statement.

"They did brainwash you! How else would you come up with the crazy idea that I'm gay!?"

"I didn't want to believe it either but it's true."

"Don't I get any say in this?" Buffy asked him, "And what about the fact that I've been sleeping with you for the past year?"

"You're just in denial. If you spent the time to look within yourself, you'd know this is true."

Flabbergasted she said "I'm straight! Straight as a board. You want me to prove it? I'll give you a blowjob right now!"

"Go home, Buffy." Riley told her, "Let's just end this quickly."

Then he walked out on her.

"Riley!" She called after him, "Riley! Don't leave me!"

-----

The walk home felt like a bad dream but it had happened.

Buffy felt like eating a tub of icecream. Her head was so messed up that she felt like sleeping in icecream, letting it cover her whole.

She walked towards the kitchen and that was when she realized something was wrong.

Reaching to her left as she got to the kitchen she pulled the vampire out of the darkness and threw him against the kitchen island.

"Hey!" Spike yelled out, "It's just me."

"You!" Buffy said scornfully, pushing him aside.

"Yeah me." Spike told her as he turned on the lights.

"What are you doing here?"

"Joyce offered to give me the basement for a day since your boyfriend blew up my home."

"He's not my boyfriend." Buffy said sadly but tearlessly. By the sound of her voice, she had already shed her daily allowance of tears..

Spike raised an eyebrow, "When did this happen?"

"Just now."

"What happened?" Spike asked with a good substitute for concern.

"Why should I tell you?"

"Because you need to talk with someone and I'm right here."

Buffy looked at the floor and said it.

"He left because I'm gay."

Buffy laughed a sad, crazy laughter that took over her voice. It was so absurd and so tragic. It tore her soul in two and brought her to her knees.

Spike stared as the slayer broke down in front of him.

He argued with himself that he should be getting off on this. After all, this was what he wanted, wasn't it? The slayer at her weakest. He wanted her to kill herself.

But an alien emotion was rising in him. It felt wrong.

He felt for her. He hurt for her.

Spike shook his head and pressed the unwanted emotion out of his head. Something he had gained some experience since he was chipped.

But he still couldn't just leave her like this so he went over to her and helped her to her feet.

"Buffy. He was a fool. You shouldn't waste your time on someone so unworthy."

Buffy looked up at him, "But I just want him."

Spike smiled weakly, "Any real man would take this as a challenge. Try to bring you back to liking guys."

Buffy pushed him away, "I'm not gay!"

"Oh. Alright then."

"I'm not!"

Spike shrugged and put on a silly grin, "Prove it."

"What?! How?!"

"Well. You're free now and I'm into casual sex. What more do you need to prove a point to yourself?"

Buffy looked at him, shocked at what he was suggesting.

"Spike. That's the most disgusting thing I've ever heard."

"See. You're gay."

"Just because I don't want to have sex with you doesn't mean I'm gay."

"Yeah. I think it does. I'm irresistible. The last time a girl resisted my charms was.. oh, that's right. It was Willow."

Buffy stared at him then laughed, "And you didn't think that just maybe you turned her gay?"

"Hey! That's not funny."

"Yeah it is."

"Buffy?" Joyce's voice came from upstairs, "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah mom. Sorry. I'll keep it down."

"Sorry." Spike called to Joyce, more quietly.

Buffy sighed, "Well. Goodnight Spike or good day or whatever. I'm going to go cry myself to sleep."

"Have fun with that." Spike told her, "Just call me if you want some help."

Buffy smirked at him then left for her room.

At the top of the stairs, she stopped at decided to check Faith before she went to bed.

The IV was back in her arm and the heartbeat monitor was beeping away almost softly.

"So how was your day?" Buffy asked Faith, "Mine sucked."

There wasn't a reply and that didn't sit right with Buffy.

She wondered what Faith would tell her right now. No doubt it would be in extremely poor taste and wouldn't be said to make Buffy feel better. But that didn't mean she didn't want to hear it.

"Riley left me because he thought I was gay. Can you believe that?"

No reply.

"You rest up, okay? You look like you need it." Buffy said and bent over to kiss Faith on the forehead.

She stopped before she did and looked at Faith's face.

Buffy looked around the room to make sure no would see then gently kissed Faith on the mouth.

Slowly she straightened back up with a contemplative look on her face.

Then she snorted, "Riley. You big fat idiot."

"Thanks, Faith. I just had to know." Buffy said. A little sadder that Riley and her broke up for no good reason.

-----

The next evening, Giles called a Scooby meeting in the magic box.

Almost everyone was in the magic box including Tara but excluding Xander and Riley.

Buffy explained Riley wouldn't be showing but didn't go into the details.

"Is this about the vampires in the brown robes?" Tara asked.

Giles frowned, "As of yet, I've found nothing on them. I presume they're in Sunnydale for some nefarious purpose. Ending the world or some such nonsense."

Willow shook her head, "It's always something with kids these days."

"So I kill them where I see them." Buffy muttered, "I can do that."

The bell rung and Xander came in with a pile of donut cartons in his hands.

Before he could put them down Anya intercepted him and kissed him while he was defenseless.

"I missed you too." he said with a grin after she let him go.

Buffy watched this and cringed but no one took too much notice of her.

"So, we on for a night of research fun?" Xander asked, putting down the donuts on the table, "Or are we still waiting for Riley to start the festivities?"

"Riley left town." Buffy told him in a natural sounding voice.

Xander took this to mean that it was a temporary thing and didn't ask anymore.

"Well. Let's get started, shall we?" Giles asked and brought out the big boring book of squiggly lines that he had been translating for the past two days and searched through it for a particular page.

"As I'm sure you all know, Buffy and Riley stopped an amorphous creature yesterday. One that I presume was commanded to retrieve this nimrodim appendix."

"So it's actually important?" Willow asked, "Faith actually did something right for once?"

Giles hemmed and nodded a bit more emphatically than his demeanor would normally allow.

"Although this will mean little to Anya and Tara, having never met her before, I'm sure the rest of us will recognize the significance of this woodcut."

Giles placed the book down, facing away from him to show a black and white picture of the first slayer that visited them in their dreams.

"That looks like that Slayer girl who cut my heart out." Xander noted.

"It is." Willow told him, having read the subtitle underneath the picture.

"And if I just turn over a few pages." Giles said, turning two pages over, "It will show the watcher's councils most secret spells for dealing with slayers, such as finding them and disempowering them and along with a few that I'm sure they don't even know about. If they knew I had this book, I'm not sure what their reaction would be. Quite possibly it would be a violent."

"Why?" Willow asked, "It's not like watchers are the only ones who know these magic rites, is it?... Is it?"

Giles smoothed back his hair, clearly agitated by something.

"If you had asked me last week, my answer would be yes, only the watchers council could have this knowledge. But now that I know about this book, I'd say it explains a few things."

"Like how evil always seems to find the slayer, no matter where we are." Buffy said gloomily.

Giles nodded, "It was always my understanding that the Slayers attracted evil to them like some sort of magnet but this makes slightly more sense. More sense if you're paranoid."

"You're not paranoid if they're actually out to get you." Willow quipped.

"Does that mean we can find the third slayer?" Tara asked, "I think it might be a good idea before her eighteenth birthday when they do that ritual."

Giles judged this question, "Yes. We could but I think we have more pressing matters to attend to. The Slayers are not the only champion of light mentioned and other things."

"Wait. Hang on. Other champions?" Xander asked, "You mean there's other things like Slayers out there?"

"Yes. That's exactly what I mean." Giles said, pleased that someone was grasping the basic concept, "I have only skimmed through a small portion and that's the impression it's giving me."

"And does each champion in the book have a corresponding page for finding them?" Willow asked to which Giles nodded gleefully.

Xander gasped, "Oh! I know what you want to do. You want to find these other slayer type people and make your own justice league!"

"If I understand you, Yes." Giles replied, troubled by the comparison Xander used, "Also, I'm stating the importance of the book. Whoever Faith took it off will want it back. It's imperative that we find out where it came from. Who knows what other tricks they have up their sleeves."

"Yeah. That stupid blob made a gaping hole in the back of the store." Anya complained, "You just don't do that."

Xander stared at the hole which until now he hadn't noticed.

Then he shrugged, "I can fix that for you."

Giles looked at him, surprised, "Really? If you could that would be most welcome."

"Sure. Supplies might cost a little but it's no biggie. How about this Saturday? If I'm not injured between then and now, of course."

"Of course. And yes. That would be splendid." Giles said, beaming a smile.

A knock on the front door brought everyone's attention to it.

"I wonder who that could that be?" Giles asked as he went to check the front door.

When he did he saw a beaming Harmony on the other side.

"Harmony." He said with dread then turned around to address the room, "Um. Just a minute, please."

Everyone stared as he left the store and closed the door behind him.

"Rupert, I've been thinking about you all day." Harmony said like a schoolgirl talking to her first love.

"Uh, yes. About that-"

"You're not.. You don't regret what happened, do you?"

"No. It's not that it's just-"

"The vampire thing. Look, I'm sure your friends can overlook that once they see how well we work together."

"Um, ah."

"My god!" Buffy shouted as she opened the front door, "Giles! I can't believe you."

"It's not what it looks like." Giles told her, backing away since Buffy looked like she was about to be violent.

"Last night I risked my life to save you and how do you repay me? By spending the night with this vampire whore."

"Hey!" Harmony yelled.

Buffy wasn't in the mood for that so she decked Harmony with a backhand.

"I trusted you!" Buffy yelled at Giles then stormed out down the road.

While Giles stood there, unsure whether to aid the unconscious vampire on the ground or run after his charge, the others had come to the door to see what was happening.

Giles looked to Xander and told him, "You get Buffy."

Understanding what he meant, Xander ran off down the road after her while Giles knelt down to access the damage to Harmony.

Xander found Buffy still storming two blocks down.

"Hey. Buffy. Wait up. Not that I didn't find it funny but why did you hit Harmony? She's harmless with all that chocolately goodness she's been eating."

Buffy stared at him, "She had sex with Giles!"

Xander blinked, "She, he in the what?! That would never happen."

"That's like me having sex with Spike." Buffy yelled out loud, "Ewww and what a gross mental image is that?"

"Are you sure about this?" Xander asked her, "Maybe they were just talking about a surprise birthday party."

"No. I heard them. I've got enhanced hearing. Remember?"

Xander frowned, "Okay. It's gross but Giles is a big boy. He'll nip this in the bud. You know that. So why did you really hit her? Did you just want to hit her? Because I'm okay with that."

Looking at the ground, Buffy told him.

"Riley left me."

"What? I thought before you said he just left town. Not that he left you."

Xander heart broke as he took this in, "Oh god. Buffy. Why didn't you say anything?"

"I don't want your sympathy."

Without warning, Xander hugged her and held her head to his chest, "You're going to get it anyway."

In spite of herself, Buffy blubbered a little then broke down and cried.

"How did this happen?" Buffy cried, "I just don't get it."

Xander didn't have any answers, so he just held her.

------

Fin.


End file.
